Missing out and Making up for it

The most annoying part about being sick is missing out on things that you want to do. I have always been a planner through and through. The kinda girl that has a to-do list for everything and never is too busy to say yes to more plans. Unfortunately, this just isn't the case anymore.

Last week was extremely rough symptom wise and I spent most of the week in bed trying to avoid the inevitable fainting spells. I was hoping that after my IV Infusion I would start feeling better because I had plans for the weekend.My little brother had to go up to University Reno Nevada for a baseball camp to show off his skills to the University coaches ( basically, he's a stud !) and I had planned on going up with he and my mom so I could visit with my cousin and her sweet baby girl who live in Reno. Well, infusion day came and went and no improvements in how I felt. A few months ago I would have pushed my stubborn self to go but I have learned that sometimes it just makes for more of a hassle for everyone and I would end up feeling even worse. So instead I decided to stay home for the weekend. At first I was bummed out of course but thanks to my amazing friends I was still able to have a great weekend.

When I decided to stay home a few of my friends came over to have sushi and watch movies for the night. Plans changed a little bit when the UPS guy showed up with my latest Scentsy order which included 5 different parties! We definitely had our work cut out for us lol. So we created a little assembly line and cranked it out while watching Law & Order SVU re-runs(all three of us are pretty much obsessed and yes sometimes I think Olivia and Elliot are my friends).One of my girls decided to spend the night and the next morning we layed low since I wasn't feeling too hot. By afternoon I had enough strength to grab lunch and take a quick shopping trip in my wheelchair. I was on a mission to find some scarves that would allow me to cover up my port without sacrificing fashion and of course I ended up at MAC and snagged a gorg new lipliner "Currant" to match my current favorite lipstick "Rebel".

       

Sunday I got out my Cricut-an absolute must have for the avid crafter or scrapbooker!-and worked on my brothers junior scrapbook .He's a senior now and it's almost baseball season again so I gotta hurry and catch up! Even though it wasn't exactly what I had planned I was able to still have a good weekend without pushing myself to the next level of sick.

Moral of the story : staying home doesn't mean you have to miss out completely

Thank you for reading and following along :)

Supporting your loved one

Having a chronic illness affects many aspects of your life but I think one of the key players is relationships.I have found that it is really easy to lose touch with friends because of a variety of reasons. I used to be the text book definition of Type A, super outgoing, friends with everyone, goofy, always had more plans than time, the life of the party type. Now I am physically just not capable of living that lifestyle and it is hard to connect with certain friends because we no longer have much in common. For others , I think its easier to distance themselves than see me the way that I now am. It's easier to not see "sick" Brittany and remember "fun" Brittany. Although a lot of people with chronic illness say that having friends that don't understand leads to lost friendships I honestly think that most people don't mean any harm by it , they just don't how to respond to their friend or family member getting sick. 

Here are a few things that you can do as a family member or friend to support your loved one:

• Participate in activities that they can be part of. Hang out at the house , watch movies, paint your nails, low key activities that won't cause any extra stress.
• Little pick me ups - I was having a terrible flare up last week and was unable to leave bed for two days. My mom came into my room with a bouquet of gorgeous hydrangeas that matched my room perfectly. When I asked her what they were for she said " because you are having a crappy day and I thought they would cheer you up." Exactly what I needed! The flowers couldn't take away my sick day but they turned my entire mood around.
• Take the time to learn about their illness .understanding is a huge part of being able to continue a relationship with that person. It shows them that you care enough about them to put in a little work so that you two can connect.
• Offer rides . Many people with chronic illnesses are unable to drive but are still able to go on outings if they have a way there.
• Offer to help cook or clean . These activities are difficult for most people with chronic illnesses.
• Invite them places. If they aren't feeling strong enough that day they will let you know but it is nice to be included. My best friend makes a huge effort in this department. She is constantly asking if I want to come hang out at the house with her and my nieces or if I want to do a target run with her even if that means she has to push a stroller and a wheelchair simultaneously.On the contrary don't send them invites to places that you KNOW they can't go. For example please don't  invite me to go skydiving... I will not feel included I will feel sad lol ( sometimes a little common sense is all it takes ) 
• Just be you. Tonight I was talking to a friend on the phone . She asked how I was feeling and I told her today wasn't the best day. She gave me support and love and we moved on to the next topic.Knowing that you have support does wonders for the soul but it is also important to just be you. Talk to your friend just like you would before they got sick. Life may have thrown them an obstacle, things may have changed but they are still the same person you have always loved.

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